The Forever Moments

When your tired of being tired and you feel you can't go on just one more minute......well your right, you can't, not with out Him. Through this journey, this Mama Journey there is one thing that I surely know....These forever moments your in right now, all too quickly become your past and "where did the time go moments?"

A young Mama, her little girl eating  peices of broken up chicken. "I just don't know how you do it How did you do this 5 times?" I smile and reply.....You just do.

Your days may seem long now and there are gonna be those times when there is no easy way out, But over the years I have found that the more I keep Him in my thoughts the more my thoughts become His......And through all the years of raising my babies I have found that at times they were raising me. I'm growing right along with them. And Oh how I love them. I know that with out a doubt I was placed on God's Green earth to be a Mama..... to be their Mama. It's what I know, it's who I am......And sometimes I'm pretty good at it. But you  know there are times I certainly fall short......I'm still sin soaked.

Dear little Mama I want you to know that this forever time doesn't last forever and if there was one thing I could leave with you, it would be to cherish every moment, even the not so nice  moments. I know what it means to have life speed past and all the while I'm grasping for moments missed.

The nest, it will be empty soon. I'm already feeling the effects......Looking up at who use to be my little man. Now he is my gentle giant. I remember those soft blond curls in the back of  his head. And do you know what I remember the most, what comes to my head the most? It's  not the forever moments it's the fleeting moments, the ones that never seemed to last long enough. In three years He could be..... he has the choice to fly. And oh how my heart aches, but at the same time I am filled with Joy. Because I know the time spent raising him, molding him, was so well worth it. I am so proud of who my children are turning out to be! And there is no way we raised them on our own! You can bet through all those forever times The Father had a hand in it. Keep your thoughts On the God/man. And so very soon your"Forever Moments" will all too quickly become faded memories.

Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. Colossians 3:2

Their American Heritage Depends On It

The older I get the more I cling to moments like this....And I find the older I get the more I cling to, hold tight to the one who paid the ultimate price.....The one who has no greater love than to lay down His life for His friends.....for me.

When I was in my youth I remember being taught, being told how important our freedom is. Being patriotic wasn't a phase it was a way of life. It was learning how to be grateful for the ones who gave it all. So we could have days like this......

Care free days in the sun. Dancing in our bare feet, playing games of yesteryear. There are two People that I get really emotional about and have great respect for.....The very first is my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  The other is The American Soldier

And my heart aches today because patriotism is sadly becoming a thing of the past. Parents are too busy...don't take the time to teach their children Our American Heritage. And to be honest most parents don't even know our American Heritage.....This Blessed Nation began with God. She was built...Her very foundation is the rock of Salvation.  Her saving grace? Is the one who gave it all
The freedom we so ungratefully take for granted is passing us by and will be forgotten history. And it's all because "WE THE PEOPLE" have chosen to bury the past, forget our heritage and let others make decisions for us. The reason America is so great is because we still have freedom through Jesus Christ and we can sleep in peace at night because of the Son and the American Soldier.

You don't have to agree with me. In fact I encourage you to dig through our American heritage and the factual documents. Find out for your self why the hand of God has been this nation's Saving Grace. Go to http://www.wallbuilders.com/ Please take the time to teach your kids what it means to be an American, to live in the land of the free. Teach them what it really means to be free......Let them know the cost of this freedom. Let them know how very important it is that we keep this nation under GOD. Their Heritage depends on it..........

Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.
 John 15:13

When The Words Aren't There

When  the words aren't there, I know that I need to be still and listen .....to be still and wait.....to be still and know that He is.........

Beloved I have no words to share. My heart is heavy and my mind is racing.....But please know that I am still here. And when the words return
My heart, I will share. Until then, in the stillness I am prayerfully waiting and I know He is GOD!

Be still, and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10

Grace Is For The Unexpected

Lawn chairs, water and the SON.....That's all you need to celebrate..... to celebrate the dead coming to life.
 I breathe in deep on a windy day as the clouds shade the sun in brief passing moments. Moments like these move all too quickly. So I bring my camera because I've missed too many moments lately.....

But none will compare to what I captured today. They say the water was warm. The breeze blowing cool across the lake. My emotions were high and my heart, if it could soar it would of taken flight.

And don't you have to die before you start living?

Doesn't the old pass away to make way for the new? When you speak His name, the one whose blood will wash you white......When you confess with your mouth That He is Lord of your Life, it is then you truly start living......

It's not the waters that save you. It's not the waves that wash you clean. And yet without water one can not live. So how appropriate the symbol of water and the true meaning of life.

And this Mama, she is overwhelmed with a JOY like no other.......

 But it's not just for my own that I have been blessed. It's all that I took in, all that consumed me while I was a witness.....

You see what I had witnessed is what everybody should know...His saving Grace is not just for the young. It doesn't exclude anyone. His grace is for everyone....

It's for the unexpected. The one who wasn't expecting the Holy Spirit to grab hold of his heart.....

The one who had to leave his boots on the bank by the water and go in with what he had on.....

It's for the aging.....The one who waited all his life to make things right.....to make things new.

It's for the one with the ruff exterior, whose heart can only be softened by the Son's love.

You see, His saving Grace is for all of us.......The Young, Old, Weak, Strong, Broken, Unexpected, Rich, Poor, me.............YOU

For God so loved the WORLD that he gave His one and only Son, that who ever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16

The water is warm. The breeze blowing cool. What are you waiting for?

More Beautiful Moments

"For I know the plans I have for you, " declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11



Right now I'm wishing I had my camera. The images in my head I want to hold tight to. I was going to bring it yesterday while we went out, I even had it in my hand. But for some reason I put it back down. And I don't get very many chances like this.........

I see his once strong, young hands now aged with tremmor. And as he holds his last grandchild I'm aching inside....And he doesn't know it. I don't tell him that what I had envisioned for him, what I had planned for his later years in life is not at all what I see happening now.

The road is hard on a man trying to make a living. After all these years of working hard to take care of his family, I ask God to please take care of him......His eyes are tired. I think to myself how much longer can this go on? I feel the thought in my head reaching down to my heart. I'm hoping he can't see it in my eyes that he can't read my mind. Hoping some how that my thoughts can't speak loud volumes.

And watching him go seems so much harder this time around. It just doesn't feel right . I know I can't change the hands of time......But God can't you just change this ending. This is not how I want this story to go. You have it all wrong. This is not the way I want the road to go. It's the wrong direction. Can't you please stop the train, switch tracks? Something....Anything but this?

And in my head over and over again, each time I ask.....beg for Him to change the course. The words that are breathing life into this broken heart are whispering.... Dear sweet child, I know your heart aches but, you must put your trust in me. For I know the plans I have for you and your Daddy,  plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

 Life can be so hard this side of heaven. And although I'm praying.......HARD, I must rest in Him. My Daddy must rest in Him.

I pray for Rest, I pray for relief.... relief of the pain that age has settled in and caused. I pray for health and better decisions. I pray for JOY to come live even in all this pain and sadness.....I pray He remembers his Joy. I pray for clear vision on my part and his. But most of all Father I pray that you hold my Daddy in your strong, loving arms. Because I can't bare to see the hurt and the pain the years have caused.......

And next time Father......next time I want to take pictures, beautiful pictures. Help me to stop and notice the beauty of the moments to come......Give me Beautiful moments......More Beautiful MOMENTS..........

Saying "Yes!"

I bring books so I can read while I watch him at practice. He likes baseball, this shy little man of mine, but he's only shy when we are out. Kinda like his Daddy, a man of few words. But when Daddy does speak out in public some how everyone listens........

On the way to his practice we had talked about little things, like how much does a proffessional base ball player make? And is a Trillion more than a billion? We get to where he thinks he has practice.....we wait. Are you sure the coach said here? "Pretty sure."  we wait some more.......

"Mama maybe you better try the other place I might be wrong." And as we are walking to the right place, he looks up at me and says "Mama I'm sorry if this has caused you any frustration." I didn't even know he knew that word. To be honest on any given day I would of been frustrated, but on this day I wasn't.......

I looked down at my little man knowing I will be looking up at him soon....It's ok Kole it's not a big deal. And he smiles those baby blues wide into my soul and I melt.......

And what good is it to let the little things become frustrations? They only end up hurting hearts and causing a divide between souls. I don't want to be remembered as their frustrated Mama. The Mama who always let the little things bother her. The Mama who couldn't let go of the dirty house frustration, or the I have so much to do frustration.....

I talked to another Mama last night who said she is learning gentlesness, just like me.....And she told me how the other day she had so much to do......"But I always have so much to do and I know that she will not always be little. so when she asked me to play I said yes."

She said yes........I'm still learning that one. Saying yes, I mean. In my heart of hearts I know that saying "yes" more often than "no" will lead to less frustration........A less frustrated Mama.......which leads to a happy, fullfilled, contented child......Why is this one so hard to learn? Slowly learning to say "Yes!" I will play with you now, I will read to you now, I will listen to you now, I will come to you now.........Yes I will LOVE on you RIGHT NOW...........

Gentle Reminders

When I was a child I use to caress her hands and think to my self "she has such pretty hands, I would know them anywhere." Always soft, always gentle......The other day I was working with my hands, flipping pancakes, frying eggs and turning sausage. I had a skip in my step and a smile in my heart.....

And even when the bickering started I refused to let it build, to well up inside. This Mama, she tends to let things pile up on her heart until her heart can't take any more. Then the littlest one she has found her  voice, she surely can use the lungs that God gave her. So among all the bickering and the loud shrills and the"Mama I don't want to!" attitudes.......

My heart implodes. I throw up my hands, throw in the towel, throw my voice and give into the enemy. I've been trying so hard to diffuse moments like this before they even get started.......And it seems the harder I try, the harder it gets.

And Lately I've been wondering where my Mama got her gentleness....Because that's all I remember........ Except this one moment, this one moment in time when she had to use her pretty gentle hand against a loud back lashing teenager who had said words that had cut through her heart and stole her peace. Words I'm so ashamed of. Words that cut deep and leave wounds raw, bare and tender.....I don't blame her. I'm afraid I deserved the crack of her hand against my sinful cheek......

And I wonder if she remembers that day? The day when I stole her gentleness away, but only for a moment. I remember distinctly how she regained her self control with tears of painful hurt.  I had caused her to do something she had never wanted to do. She sent me to my room until my Daddy got home......Oh the long wait, the torture of waiting and knowing how I had disappointed them.

And then in that moment while I was thinking of the disappointment I had caused I think right now how I have disappointed my Father in Heaven for giving up so easily, for letting the anger pile up and not giving it to Him. For thinking I can do this when in all reality I can't.........Not with out Him. And to truly be in His will for my life I must be BROKEN.......I read a blog from Proverbs 31 Ministries this morning that moved my buried Gentle heart into action.....And while they are things I already know it was a gentle reminder that in order to be the Mama He wants me to be, I must lay it all down before Him. It's a constant battle to get rid of self.....To empty my vessel.

Yesterday before I even put my feet on the floor, I made sure Him and I had a little chat...And we continued to have little chats through out our day.....And I can just see Him smiling because that's all He wanted is for me to look towards heaven......Set my eyes on Him.

To be Gentle you have to look to the ONE who gives Gentle Reminders....

Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. Colossians 3:2

The Perfect Carpenter

We have wonderful neighbors across the way. The kids often go and visit them just to spend time with them....And as I'm writing this I want them to know that I felt the same way they did when they saw what he did. Disappointment.....Discouragement.......Disbelief......

He's been wanting to work with wood lately. To build things with his own two hands. He had went over and asked for help. He wanted to build a house, and so they helped....Nailing each board together. Putting tile in for the floor. Painting it. He brought it home and there it sat........He had said before that the house was meant for her. That's why he built it.

Imagine now, after all the hard work that the neighbors had put in, to make it special and then they find it tore apart on the shop floor........

Her birthday was coming up....They have always been close, Butterfly girl and Little man. Always together giggling, playing, just being....together. And he knew that she wanted and needed a toy box, even more than a doll house. She was always asking for one. Always wanting one like his.

When there was no more wood, no more scraps lying around. He did the next best thing. He tore apart the house to build the box. A box to put her things in. He worked hard. He only had two days. He did it on his own with very little help.......He knew what he wanted, he knew just what to do. He would work on it during the day and go up to the shop at night after supper  to hammer nails. You could tell it was important to him....so very important.

And when he brought it home, the look on his face was priceless. "Mama do ya think she'll like it?" I know she will, I said. So proud of what he had done, what he had accomplished. And I know it came at a price. The building of this box had hurt some hearts.....

But I want them to know all is not lost. When he found out  he had hurt our dear neighbors, he took what was broken, what had been torn apart and he salvaged it. He saved what was left.... It was suppose to be a doll house but now.........

It sits in our garage and we are using it as our garden shelf. Sometimes in life we think we are meant for one thing and how could we possibly be another? And sometimes.....most times, change can cause hurt and frustration. It's impossible to not step on hearts......We are all imperfect humans, but we have a Carpenter, a Perfect Carpenter who can take our scraps from what we were and turn us into something that glorifies Him. Something that He can use to further His Kingdom, to serve others........To Love others.

 Dear Precious neighbors our kids love and adore you.....You are appreciated for all you do, for who you are. So thankful, So blessed to have you in our lives.