I often think about the people that have come and gone in my life.....I am thankful for the ones who chose to stay...oddly enough I am also thankful for the ones who chose to walk away.
Do you ever just sit in the quiet of the setting sun and think about the people, places and moments that shaped you into who you are today? Do you ever just look at your aging parents and wonder how in the world did the time just get ripped right out of their hands?.....How were you placed in the very spot they were once in?
Do you ever just look for hope hopelessly and believe that it will never be found........
Do you just want to go back and change things? Words that you spoke, actions that you took?
Many times I have been out here on this piece of ground watching the sun go down. Many, many pictures taken....Many, many thoughts had come and gone, some regrets, but He chose to give grace when I chose the wrong path and for that I am deeply grateful.
As for HOPE, well it was never lost....Not if your found. As hopeless as things might seem ....Truly the Maker of heaven and earth breathes hope into your soul. He gives life and puts wind beneath your wings.
And at times this earthly body struggles to be the vessel you need it to be, but never once will your soul struggle to live. Because Hope is found in the heart of the created. HOPE is longing to be with the Maker.
We are put on this earth not for ourselves, we are put on this earth to share that HOPE. Even in the midst of our struggles our light shall never fade.
Be the HOPE in every dark corner......Because you may be the only HOPE that some or even just one can see.
My life certainly has not been picture perfect. I've made unwise choices that cost me dearly. But wisdom comes from error and trials. It's what shapes you ......molds you. Refines you. And He nudges and urges me to be more like Him every day.....And there are times when I fail...miserably. His Grace is more than I can understand. His mercy unfailing.......And so there is my light....My hope to get back up and try again. And I Press On.........
A place of encouragement:
Living By Faith, Walking in the Light, Saved By His Amazing Grace
Thursday, October 29, 2015
Thursday, October 15, 2015
Wondering If God Tells You....
Went to the barn this morning. It was still dark. It felt quite cool. I thought of you as I always do coming up the road that you and that old gulf cart traveled every day with out fail. Today is bitter sweet....We are all wondering, should we celebrate? Wondering if it's all still too raw...This empty hole that no one else can fill. I wished you a Happy Birthday in the light of the stars told you I missed you....Wondering if God tells you.......
Wondering if God tells you every night before the littles go to bed that we pray for Grandmom. We ask God to tell you we love and miss you. Wondering if the hugs of love are heaven bound.....
Wondering if He tells you that Grandmom, well, She is holding on. She tells me all the time how much she misses her man. And oh how proud you would be of all the kids! They've all stepped up and pitched in......Kole feeds the steers. Johnny told him he could have the first calf that was born if he kept up the good work. Oh and by the way, Kole wanted the honor of burying your earthly body in the ground......Did God ever tell you how your kids and grand kids spoke at your funeral...Wondering if you heard all the nice things that were being said. Wondering if you knew the church was packed...
And we all have our moments of tears and still wishing you were here. Really wanting to talk to you again and hear your loud beautiful laughter....
Johnny had Hunter go pick up some trees today in Cocoa Beach so they could plant them where we all said goodbye. Kieth, Johnny, Hunter and Jacob built a really nice fence and Jason stained it.....I'm wondering if you already know....
We are all taking really good care of your bride. Cheryl has her over every Wednesday night for supper. Fay has her over every day for lunch and I have her over the other nights for supper. Shiney moved in with her to keep her company......The nights are really hard, but she is strong and she will be just fine......We all really love her so....Wondering if God tells you how everyone in the family pops in on her, actually we won't leaver her alone..... Butterfly girl doesn't miss a day without going over to visit. Wondering if your smiling down on us......Wondering if you know how very much you are truly missed........Happy Birthday
Just wondering if God tells you all those things.............
Wondering if God tells you every night before the littles go to bed that we pray for Grandmom. We ask God to tell you we love and miss you. Wondering if the hugs of love are heaven bound.....
Wondering if He tells you that Grandmom, well, She is holding on. She tells me all the time how much she misses her man. And oh how proud you would be of all the kids! They've all stepped up and pitched in......Kole feeds the steers. Johnny told him he could have the first calf that was born if he kept up the good work. Oh and by the way, Kole wanted the honor of burying your earthly body in the ground......Did God ever tell you how your kids and grand kids spoke at your funeral...Wondering if you heard all the nice things that were being said. Wondering if you knew the church was packed...
And we all have our moments of tears and still wishing you were here. Really wanting to talk to you again and hear your loud beautiful laughter....
Johnny had Hunter go pick up some trees today in Cocoa Beach so they could plant them where we all said goodbye. Kieth, Johnny, Hunter and Jacob built a really nice fence and Jason stained it.....I'm wondering if you already know....
We are all taking really good care of your bride. Cheryl has her over every Wednesday night for supper. Fay has her over every day for lunch and I have her over the other nights for supper. Shiney moved in with her to keep her company......The nights are really hard, but she is strong and she will be just fine......We all really love her so....Wondering if God tells you how everyone in the family pops in on her, actually we won't leaver her alone..... Butterfly girl doesn't miss a day without going over to visit. Wondering if your smiling down on us......Wondering if you know how very much you are truly missed........Happy Birthday
Just wondering if God tells you all those things.............
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
Mama If I could Share With You
Mama if I could share with you......If I could tell you that your worth is so much more than you know. If you only knew how important you are...If you knew that you were hand picked by God for those babies down the hall, would your perception of this life be rearranged? If you could only see the value in being the one they get to call Mama.
The world will never satisfy...Never beable to fill you up. Never make you feel valued for who you are. Because the world's vision of self worth is slow self destruction. Do and be, lose this, gain that...Until you've lost sight of what God has instore for your precious soul.
There is no perfect potion, no magic number. No amount of status quo can fill what has left a hole. You will never be good enough for the world.......But you are always priceless in God's eyes. Precious just the way you are. Perfect for the man He chose for you. No other Mama could fill your shoes....no other Mama could love those babies like you.......
For her children arise and call her blessed, her husband also and he praises her. Such a priceless gift to be given. He believes you are worthy. Sanctified...Set Apart......Someone with value....You are His!
So when the past creeps in and the voices get loud, tell you "Your no good". Remind you of who you were and what you did...Know, you are never with out hope. You are God's child. Your past does not define your present! Your past is there to strengthen your NOW. Reminds you of how far He's brought you....Reminds you of how much you needed a Savior.
The world will fail you. Leave you empty and tired of trying to be something you were never meant to be. You were meant to be His....Child of God....Precious one, let Him show you your worth. His sacrifice ran blood red and scarred deep.......You. Are. Worthy. Because of His Sacrifice.
The world will never satisfy...Never beable to fill you up. Never make you feel valued for who you are. Because the world's vision of self worth is slow self destruction. Do and be, lose this, gain that...Until you've lost sight of what God has instore for your precious soul.
There is no perfect potion, no magic number. No amount of status quo can fill what has left a hole. You will never be good enough for the world.......But you are always priceless in God's eyes. Precious just the way you are. Perfect for the man He chose for you. No other Mama could fill your shoes....no other Mama could love those babies like you.......
For her children arise and call her blessed, her husband also and he praises her. Such a priceless gift to be given. He believes you are worthy. Sanctified...Set Apart......Someone with value....You are His!
So when the past creeps in and the voices get loud, tell you "Your no good". Remind you of who you were and what you did...Know, you are never with out hope. You are God's child. Your past does not define your present! Your past is there to strengthen your NOW. Reminds you of how far He's brought you....Reminds you of how much you needed a Savior.
The world will fail you. Leave you empty and tired of trying to be something you were never meant to be. You were meant to be His....Child of God....Precious one, let Him show you your worth. His sacrifice ran blood red and scarred deep.......You. Are. Worthy. Because of His Sacrifice.
Friday, September 4, 2015
In Our Litttle Corner of the World
In my little corner I choose hope......I choose to love even when it seems impossible to love. And when my heart breaks from all the darkness in this world I choose to be a light. That light in which He tells us cannot be hidden. The light that out shines and makes the dark one flee. I choose to be a voice for life and not death. Death has no sting on my saved soul.
I choose to speak truth even when truth no longer makes sense to most. For the message of the wooden cross is foolishness to those with out hope......But to us who are being saved it is the power of Adonai, Our God. And He reigns like a Lion in this heart of mine.
In my little corner I will be that friend you can trust...I will be that friend who has your back even when we don't agree, I will still be your friend. Because I believe there is way too much division in this world and we have lost what has made us one.......I don't care what color you are.....I don't care what you believe to be true......The only way we can get past our past is to look ahead. We are all created by One Creator. Uniquely different, but yet the same. Just as I respect you, can you respect me? I'm not here to force my beliefs upon you....I'm called to share the truth unapologetically......unashamed and with LOVE. That's it, no ties... No strings attatched. You may move on and I will not follow. It's okay.....You are free to choose.
Beloved you have to see that this place is no longer safe.....She is no longer freedom.....She no longer stands strong and defends the weak. But you and I? We can....In our little corner of the world we can stand for Hope. Stand in the gap and help the weak. Speak out for the innocent and breathe LIFE. WE can unite and be LOVE even when we disagree...We can still agree on LOVE. The Great Commission....Surely will not be easy. But it is my/our purpose. That is truly why we are here. It's not about our wardrobe or body. It's not about the nit picky things through out our day. It's so much bigger than you and I, but when we unite just think of the possibilities! It all starts in your corner of the world. Don't give up....Don't call it quits.....Stop saying it's the end. Its not over till it's over! And we know who wins.......There are aching souls out there that still need hope. The time is now!
I choose to speak truth even when truth no longer makes sense to most. For the message of the wooden cross is foolishness to those with out hope......But to us who are being saved it is the power of Adonai, Our God. And He reigns like a Lion in this heart of mine.
In my little corner I will be that friend you can trust...I will be that friend who has your back even when we don't agree, I will still be your friend. Because I believe there is way too much division in this world and we have lost what has made us one.......I don't care what color you are.....I don't care what you believe to be true......The only way we can get past our past is to look ahead. We are all created by One Creator. Uniquely different, but yet the same. Just as I respect you, can you respect me? I'm not here to force my beliefs upon you....I'm called to share the truth unapologetically......unashamed and with LOVE. That's it, no ties... No strings attatched. You may move on and I will not follow. It's okay.....You are free to choose.
Beloved you have to see that this place is no longer safe.....She is no longer freedom.....She no longer stands strong and defends the weak. But you and I? We can....In our little corner of the world we can stand for Hope. Stand in the gap and help the weak. Speak out for the innocent and breathe LIFE. WE can unite and be LOVE even when we disagree...We can still agree on LOVE. The Great Commission....Surely will not be easy. But it is my/our purpose. That is truly why we are here. It's not about our wardrobe or body. It's not about the nit picky things through out our day. It's so much bigger than you and I, but when we unite just think of the possibilities! It all starts in your corner of the world. Don't give up....Don't call it quits.....Stop saying it's the end. Its not over till it's over! And we know who wins.......There are aching souls out there that still need hope. The time is now!
Saturday, August 22, 2015
Are You Taking Pictures?
One thing I realized this week going through years of pictures is that the number of pictures started to dwindle as the time went on........I found myself wishing I would of been more up to date with my picture taking.......Found myself wishing I made the time to put music girl in his lap so that she had that memory......Found out that it hurts when you go about your day and don't take the time to just stop what I am doing to go make memories......Found out how much I took him living forever for granted. Always thought I had time. Thought he would be here......for a lot more years.
Sunshine girl frantically looked for just one more recent picture, One more precious memory. Gentle giant came in and asked why there hadn't been any more memories put on paper.......And with all these crazy days of just trying to get things done you realize that you have forgotten to do the one thing that was more important than all the rest..............taking time ....making time to record the memories.
Funny how death brings light to life......Strange how losing one makes you hold tight to others.....Makes you forgiving of all you couldn't let go. Helps you to understand that this thing called life is more precious than your chore list.......
And as time dulls that piercing pain I pray that the memory of lessons learned will not dull or fade too.
This weekend brings family and friends. This weekend brings memories. I'm charging my camera battery right now as I type.......Why not get your camera out too, before that one person who was suppose to be here forever is no longer here....
Sunshine girl frantically looked for just one more recent picture, One more precious memory. Gentle giant came in and asked why there hadn't been any more memories put on paper.......And with all these crazy days of just trying to get things done you realize that you have forgotten to do the one thing that was more important than all the rest..............taking time ....making time to record the memories.
Funny how death brings light to life......Strange how losing one makes you hold tight to others.....Makes you forgiving of all you couldn't let go. Helps you to understand that this thing called life is more precious than your chore list.......
And as time dulls that piercing pain I pray that the memory of lessons learned will not dull or fade too.
This weekend brings family and friends. This weekend brings memories. I'm charging my camera battery right now as I type.......Why not get your camera out too, before that one person who was suppose to be here forever is no longer here....
Monday, August 17, 2015
It Started With Him
You always wonder how you would handle the news......No matter how much you think you are prepared for this thing called life, it comes whipping in like a storm and smacks you in the face. knocks you down, makes you lose your breath. Moments like these certainly put life into perspective, makes things chrystal clear. Shows you what needs to be worked on....What needs to be let go...Shows you how to be thankful for what you were given.
This family it comes together often. Every holiday, every birthday. It started with him......He led well. Was honest about life. Thought he was always right and oddly enough more times than not he was. And when we thought he wasn't, it provoked deep thought, led us to find the answers for ourselves....But it always started with him.
After the shock comes the memories.....they flood your mind, make you smile, make you laugh, make you fall to your knees and hurt that deep hurt that comes from loving so hard..... comes from years of living. Doing what is good ...Learning how to come together after we fall apart. Realizing that blood truly is thicker than water. Knowing we won't always get it right, but always forgiving when we get it wrong.
The family has been going through piles and piles of pictures. So many memories....Soo many stories...WE all sat around the table yesterday and what I loved the most is when we were sharing our memories, it was the laughter that filled our home and in the back ground, I could hear that man's laughter.....Little man walks out to the porch to sit by himself...I meet him right where it hurts. He tells me "Mama I can still hear his voice. I can still hear his laughter." And I could honestly tell him from my heart that that is the one thing you will never ever forget! It will always ring in your ears. The crackling sound of his voice. And many times you will find he will be your voice in all of the lessons he taught you. Just be willing to listen......
If legacies are what make the man, then the legacy he left behind is one of Strong Faith in the Lord. You knew that about him if you knew him at all. What I will miss the most is his prayer before we all sat down together to eat or celebrate......The Patriarch always took his place....It was him to lead his family in prayer. He was first in line for the food. It started with him.
The legacy of family, this is where his passion came roaring in. He wanted to be involved in every ones life, Every little detail. It was his passion to help you, because he knew best. He didn't want to see any of us fail. Sometimes that was hard for us to swallow.....Hard for us not to rebel.....I rebelled.....It's those moments that make you wish you would of handled things better than you did....My man taught me how to repect the man he called his father....RESPECT means a lot in life. No regrets. No do overs.
And how do we get to that place where the daily habits of his life won't hurt us so much? How do we go through another family gathering without our Patriarch? How do we.........live with out this man that has been such a dominate figure in every one's life? When will the tears stop flowing? When will the pain not be so piercing?
I've been in this spot a couple times before......I can still hear the crackling laughter of my own grandpa ringing in my ears. I remember the pain of losing him and how piercing it was. What I know is, time can dull the pain, but time can also make you miss them more. It's only by the Grace of God that we as a Family will be able move on. Our focus now turns to our beloved Matriarch.....Oh how she is loved. And oh how much she needs us all right now.....For a long time to come. 57 years together, morphing into one. He was her world.........It started with him asking her out.....It started with him.......
This family it comes together often. Every holiday, every birthday. It started with him......He led well. Was honest about life. Thought he was always right and oddly enough more times than not he was. And when we thought he wasn't, it provoked deep thought, led us to find the answers for ourselves....But it always started with him.
After the shock comes the memories.....they flood your mind, make you smile, make you laugh, make you fall to your knees and hurt that deep hurt that comes from loving so hard..... comes from years of living. Doing what is good ...Learning how to come together after we fall apart. Realizing that blood truly is thicker than water. Knowing we won't always get it right, but always forgiving when we get it wrong.
The family has been going through piles and piles of pictures. So many memories....Soo many stories...WE all sat around the table yesterday and what I loved the most is when we were sharing our memories, it was the laughter that filled our home and in the back ground, I could hear that man's laughter.....Little man walks out to the porch to sit by himself...I meet him right where it hurts. He tells me "Mama I can still hear his voice. I can still hear his laughter." And I could honestly tell him from my heart that that is the one thing you will never ever forget! It will always ring in your ears. The crackling sound of his voice. And many times you will find he will be your voice in all of the lessons he taught you. Just be willing to listen......
If legacies are what make the man, then the legacy he left behind is one of Strong Faith in the Lord. You knew that about him if you knew him at all. What I will miss the most is his prayer before we all sat down together to eat or celebrate......The Patriarch always took his place....It was him to lead his family in prayer. He was first in line for the food. It started with him.
The legacy of family, this is where his passion came roaring in. He wanted to be involved in every ones life, Every little detail. It was his passion to help you, because he knew best. He didn't want to see any of us fail. Sometimes that was hard for us to swallow.....Hard for us not to rebel.....I rebelled.....It's those moments that make you wish you would of handled things better than you did....My man taught me how to repect the man he called his father....RESPECT means a lot in life. No regrets. No do overs.
And how do we get to that place where the daily habits of his life won't hurt us so much? How do we go through another family gathering without our Patriarch? How do we.........live with out this man that has been such a dominate figure in every one's life? When will the tears stop flowing? When will the pain not be so piercing?
I've been in this spot a couple times before......I can still hear the crackling laughter of my own grandpa ringing in my ears. I remember the pain of losing him and how piercing it was. What I know is, time can dull the pain, but time can also make you miss them more. It's only by the Grace of God that we as a Family will be able move on. Our focus now turns to our beloved Matriarch.....Oh how she is loved. And oh how much she needs us all right now.....For a long time to come. 57 years together, morphing into one. He was her world.........It started with him asking her out.....It started with him.......
Tuesday, August 11, 2015
Be That Gift That's Worth Opening
How do you find the grace to change with the seasons? How do you let the Sun wash over you and be at peace as your vessel begins to fade to grey? And when do you find that moment where things just aren't the same? ..........Because it's always changing, some one is always growing, learning and turning into a different version of self.
They tell me it's a slow progression, but I tell you it's anything but slow. I turned my head, blinked for only a moment and here I am looking at my man and asking how we got from there to here so quickly....... and this life is only but a whispered breath. Mama says "The days are long, but the years are short." And she's grasping, trying to hold on.....I feel her pain of wanting those days back. At the same time she rejoices in the present.
So many times I ask how we can be in two places at the same time? In One place your holding on not wanting to lose your grip , the other, your learning how to let go gracefully.
I don't claim to have the answers to life, but I do know life is not meant to be lived alone. Life is meant to be shared. All the ugliness, all of the raw moments, all of the "fall on your face" kind of days, they were meant to be shared. All of the bitter sweet growing pain moments, All of the very first time moments, the sentimental moments, The whispered "I love you" moments, were meant to be given and not kept.
A life lived "Real" is a life worth sharing.
Even the messy, raw moments of life should be shared. To be real in front of on lookers makes them aware they are not alone in their mess.........That real people have regrets and make mistakes....That real people don't have it all figured out and no one should ever be put so high on a pedastal that they end up breaking when they hit the ground. Living this life can be confusing, but it's never with out meaning or direction. He is your light in the darkest of nights.
You are someone's God given gift. Someone He chose just for them. And you are more than likely a gift to multiple people. Be the gift that's worth cherishing, worth opening, worth remembering.......Because this life is but a whispered breath. Spend every moment as if it were your very last. Change is a given......Learn to grow from it. Learn to roll with it....But most of all, learn to share it!
They tell me it's a slow progression, but I tell you it's anything but slow. I turned my head, blinked for only a moment and here I am looking at my man and asking how we got from there to here so quickly....... and this life is only but a whispered breath. Mama says "The days are long, but the years are short." And she's grasping, trying to hold on.....I feel her pain of wanting those days back. At the same time she rejoices in the present.
So many times I ask how we can be in two places at the same time? In One place your holding on not wanting to lose your grip , the other, your learning how to let go gracefully.
I don't claim to have the answers to life, but I do know life is not meant to be lived alone. Life is meant to be shared. All the ugliness, all of the raw moments, all of the "fall on your face" kind of days, they were meant to be shared. All of the bitter sweet growing pain moments, All of the very first time moments, the sentimental moments, The whispered "I love you" moments, were meant to be given and not kept.
A life lived "Real" is a life worth sharing.
Even the messy, raw moments of life should be shared. To be real in front of on lookers makes them aware they are not alone in their mess.........That real people have regrets and make mistakes....That real people don't have it all figured out and no one should ever be put so high on a pedastal that they end up breaking when they hit the ground. Living this life can be confusing, but it's never with out meaning or direction. He is your light in the darkest of nights.
You are someone's God given gift. Someone He chose just for them. And you are more than likely a gift to multiple people. Be the gift that's worth cherishing, worth opening, worth remembering.......Because this life is but a whispered breath. Spend every moment as if it were your very last. Change is a given......Learn to grow from it. Learn to roll with it....But most of all, learn to share it!
Tuesday, August 4, 2015
Something About This Place
I was never made for the bright lights of the city. Never wanted to be in large, loud crowds and places. And when ever I find myself there I feel anxious. There is something special about being where trees never see pavement. So peaceful to hear the birds sing their lonesome song. To see the fence line in the morning with slow milking bovines chewing cud on the other side is devine.....
Something about sinking your hands in the earth makes you feel at home, makes you remember where you came from. Something about the setting sun makes you feel the rythym of the internal time clock.
There is something about being able to provide and sustain on this God given land. Something about farm life that makes me feel I'm right where I need to be.
Something about being close to God's creatures as you learn their purpose and yes even their charm.
I can't imagine not being able to hear, see, touch this quiet piece of land. Can't imagine not feeling the grass between my toes or that earthy smell of flowers and fresh cut hay. Can't imagine not having that feeling of wanting to spread my arms like wings in this wide open space........
Something about the many faces of the sun as it rises and falls to the rythym of the day. The mysterious way it hangs so perfectly. How it calls the moon to take it's spot and rightfully so.
And as I take in this beauty day in and day out.......Dusk til Dawn as I hear the morning choir of birds chirping to the evening song of crickets and a lone barn owl bringing in the night......I am truly and deeply thankful and humbly blessed to be given these gifts every day!
I take a deep breath and breathe in LIFE..........
Something about sinking your hands in the earth makes you feel at home, makes you remember where you came from. Something about the setting sun makes you feel the rythym of the internal time clock.
There is something about being able to provide and sustain on this God given land. Something about farm life that makes me feel I'm right where I need to be.
Something about being close to God's creatures as you learn their purpose and yes even their charm.
Something about the many faces of the sun as it rises and falls to the rythym of the day. The mysterious way it hangs so perfectly. How it calls the moon to take it's spot and rightfully so.
And as I take in this beauty day in and day out.......Dusk til Dawn as I hear the morning choir of birds chirping to the evening song of crickets and a lone barn owl bringing in the night......I am truly and deeply thankful and humbly blessed to be given these gifts every day!
I take a deep breath and breathe in LIFE..........
Thursday, July 30, 2015
How Battles Are Won
Wake up, stumble to the bathroom. In the dark I get dressed and with a dim light I brush my teeth. He's still sleeping. So many times it has always been him to wake before me. So many times he's left me sleeping. I quietly put on my boots and walk out the door. It's that grey space before the light hits the dawn, makes you feel like your the only one.
And this world she keeps spinning and we all just keep doing.......Doing what needs to be done, doing right and trying so hard to keep out the wrong....But this world keeps spitting out the mud as we watch it splatter. Messes up all our plans and breaks all our hearts. Knocks the wind right out of us. It's hard to catch your breath when your drowning in the depths of someone else's choices.....someone else's greed......someone else's plans. And we are living in the days where right is wrong and wrong is right. I try holding on to only lose my grip of all that I can't grasp, all that I can't understand.
When a monument of the Ten commandments about living life right is voted to be tore down because apparently living a good life is offensive then I have to ask why? When baby parts are being sold for the almighty dollar, when human life just don't seem to matter, then my heart just can't bare the crushing weight of insanity, insensativity.......In this world we have lost compassion and traded it for hatred and greed and self fullfillment....In this crazy world we have lost our minds. Lost our courage our rights, our freedom all because of ignorance and silence.
I come back from the barn....some days I wish it could always be as peaceful and sweet as just doing my morning chores. That all will be right with this ever spinning ball placed so eloquently in space. Not too close to the sun and not too far away......But just right.....And as she spins she's kissed by the warmth of rays.
But we are fighting a battle and battles can't be fought with warm fuzzy mornings and quiet sips of coffee. Battles are fought with words of courage. Battles are fought standing our ground and speaking out. Battles are won with prayer and faith. Battles are won with kindness and love, respect and wisdom. We are called to live this life in such a way that the rays of the Son are kissing those around us.
And we are to remember this is not our home. This is not where it ends. So many need to know the Hope we keep inside. So many need to have the peace that only the Author of the Ten Commandments can bring. Because He rights every wrong. Pulls Good from the doom. Has a plan in motion. We are the generation that is watching the Bible play out in real live time. He said this was going to happen.
Take heart, He has overcome this spinning, mud flinging world. Buckle up we are going for a ride! Be Brave, Be Strong, Be Courageous....Be Love....Be Hope....Be Peace.....Be in Prayer. BE HIS
And this world she keeps spinning and we all just keep doing.......Doing what needs to be done, doing right and trying so hard to keep out the wrong....But this world keeps spitting out the mud as we watch it splatter. Messes up all our plans and breaks all our hearts. Knocks the wind right out of us. It's hard to catch your breath when your drowning in the depths of someone else's choices.....someone else's greed......someone else's plans. And we are living in the days where right is wrong and wrong is right. I try holding on to only lose my grip of all that I can't grasp, all that I can't understand.
When a monument of the Ten commandments about living life right is voted to be tore down because apparently living a good life is offensive then I have to ask why? When baby parts are being sold for the almighty dollar, when human life just don't seem to matter, then my heart just can't bare the crushing weight of insanity, insensativity.......In this world we have lost compassion and traded it for hatred and greed and self fullfillment....In this crazy world we have lost our minds. Lost our courage our rights, our freedom all because of ignorance and silence.
I come back from the barn....some days I wish it could always be as peaceful and sweet as just doing my morning chores. That all will be right with this ever spinning ball placed so eloquently in space. Not too close to the sun and not too far away......But just right.....And as she spins she's kissed by the warmth of rays.
But we are fighting a battle and battles can't be fought with warm fuzzy mornings and quiet sips of coffee. Battles are fought with words of courage. Battles are fought standing our ground and speaking out. Battles are won with prayer and faith. Battles are won with kindness and love, respect and wisdom. We are called to live this life in such a way that the rays of the Son are kissing those around us.
And we are to remember this is not our home. This is not where it ends. So many need to know the Hope we keep inside. So many need to have the peace that only the Author of the Ten Commandments can bring. Because He rights every wrong. Pulls Good from the doom. Has a plan in motion. We are the generation that is watching the Bible play out in real live time. He said this was going to happen.
Take heart, He has overcome this spinning, mud flinging world. Buckle up we are going for a ride! Be Brave, Be Strong, Be Courageous....Be Love....Be Hope....Be Peace.....Be in Prayer. BE HIS
Tuesday, July 28, 2015
When We Choose To Go Slow
In the slow of the day there is life ....are you willing to live it in a way that they will remember it was worth living.
I spend every day with them, but I often have to ask myself, Am I spending time with them? You can be in the same room in the same space and yet still be so far away.
And I hear you when you say "I'm just so tired." Your tired of being the referee, tired of being the maid, tired of waiting on instead of being waited on. Oh my beloved, I get in thoose places that seem to want to hold you down and keep you captive.....But you have the key....You've always had the key. He says "Come find rest in me." Get filled up and then go spend some quality time with them....Go for a walk, bake some cookies, draw a picture....Involve them in your day. If they are little, chances are they are willing to please you.....Let them please you, even if it takes sorting those socks a whole lot longer...You will remember the sound of their sweet, sweet voice as they try to carry on a worthy conversation.....It's worth remembering.
I believe your gonna have those crazy days when nothing goes right......But always remember....I have to always remember, I don't have to stay there in that moment. I have the key to unlock the door.......I have the freedom to choose how I behave. And they are watching my every move.
I can freely move beyond that moment and make a new one.......That's Powerful. When you have the option, Choose to go slow.........It Matters!
I spend every day with them, but I often have to ask myself, Am I spending time with them? You can be in the same room in the same space and yet still be so far away.
And I hear you when you say "I'm just so tired." Your tired of being the referee, tired of being the maid, tired of waiting on instead of being waited on. Oh my beloved, I get in thoose places that seem to want to hold you down and keep you captive.....But you have the key....You've always had the key. He says "Come find rest in me." Get filled up and then go spend some quality time with them....Go for a walk, bake some cookies, draw a picture....Involve them in your day. If they are little, chances are they are willing to please you.....Let them please you, even if it takes sorting those socks a whole lot longer...You will remember the sound of their sweet, sweet voice as they try to carry on a worthy conversation.....It's worth remembering.
I believe your gonna have those crazy days when nothing goes right......But always remember....I have to always remember, I don't have to stay there in that moment. I have the key to unlock the door.......I have the freedom to choose how I behave. And they are watching my every move.
I can freely move beyond that moment and make a new one.......That's Powerful. When you have the option, Choose to go slow.........It Matters!
Saturday, July 25, 2015
She Stops Me In My Busy Tracks..
Flower girl stops me in my busy tracks to show me life. Slow moving life.
She reminds me to slow down often. Stops me in my busy tracks. Tells me I'm going too fast. So much we miss when we speed through life. So many little moments worth slowing down for. So many times I've missed the moment to catch a snail, a smile, a tear, a hug, a thought, a touch. All because of my need to get things done. I'm running around like I have a time clock tick, tick, ticking in my head.......And I do, but I'm afraid I all too often listen to the wrong clock. And her time for being small is tick, tick, ticking away......
It's funny to me how many things they will notice in a walk or a moment when they are willing to take the time. Funny how us Mamas could be doing the very same things if we just choose to slow down those busy tracks once in a while.
This sweet girl usually brings me beautiful flowers, but on that particular day she brought me so much more. She brought me to my knees so that I could get closer to what she was seeing, closer to what she thought was worth slowing down for......She brought me closer to her moments.
Every moment is valuable. Every moment can be teachable. Every moment should be considered before speeding through, leaving nothing but our busy tracks.
She reminds me to slow down often. Stops me in my busy tracks. Tells me I'm going too fast. So much we miss when we speed through life. So many little moments worth slowing down for. So many times I've missed the moment to catch a snail, a smile, a tear, a hug, a thought, a touch. All because of my need to get things done. I'm running around like I have a time clock tick, tick, ticking in my head.......And I do, but I'm afraid I all too often listen to the wrong clock. And her time for being small is tick, tick, ticking away......
It's funny to me how many things they will notice in a walk or a moment when they are willing to take the time. Funny how us Mamas could be doing the very same things if we just choose to slow down those busy tracks once in a while.
This sweet girl usually brings me beautiful flowers, but on that particular day she brought me so much more. She brought me to my knees so that I could get closer to what she was seeing, closer to what she thought was worth slowing down for......She brought me closer to her moments.
Every moment is valuable. Every moment can be teachable. Every moment should be considered before speeding through, leaving nothing but our busy tracks.
Friday, July 24, 2015
Won't You Rejoin Me?
Have you ever had that moment when God told you to be silent? And you knew in your heart of hearts your words had lost their meaning because you had lost your perspective......Because literally, your well had run dry....
That has been me.....I've always loved to write. Love even more to put pen to paper than to tap these letters on this keyboard. But God has with out a doubt told me "To be still and know that He is God" for quite a while. And don't think I haven't tried many, many times to sit here and tap out my soul, because I have, but nothing would come......
You see He teaches me life's lessons when I'm most willing to be quiet and listen. I can't speak of things not lived and learned. I can't give you a word of comfort if I'm not willing to be comforted. And shame on me if I've ever acted in such an arrogant way that I sounded as if I knew best or I had more wisdom than was given! I believe we all want to be loved and accepted, but until we learn to be honest about who we really need love and acceptance from then we will always feel empty and our well dry........
Sometimes.....Most times, wisdom comes in being silent.....being still.....knowing when to speak and when to stop speaking. Knowing when to type and when to stop typing.
I've missed being here so much. I'm not sure what He has instore but I know I'm not sharing unless it's what He wants me to share.
I must be honest, with all of this time off, I've had so many words swirling around inside my head. They all seemed liked a jumbled up mess, but lately they've been taking on structure and form. coming into sentences and complete thoughts. And I couldn't be more thrilled! If you love to write then you know what I mean.....Oh I'm just an amateur....I'm more grammatically incorrect than I am correct.....So please bare with my imperfections. I'm hoping these words typed out will have meaning, order and subtance. Something you and I can nibble on from time to time. I've told you before I type a lot of my words out of my own feelings of conviction. I don't poke fingers towards others and then write about it. I share my heart.......Words can either be healing or hurtful...I choose healing. Won't you rejoin me on my journey with Our one True King? I'm so happy to be back!
Tuesday, March 17, 2015
Growing Old Gracefully
Text comes through from an early morning friend.......Tells me she may be going crazy...This being a wife and Mama thing can bring you to a point where you forget who you are. When you question why your here.....And the Blessings flow like a raging river but you feel like your drowning all at the same time. You want to be thankful....You know you should be thankful.....
Sometimes we get so afraid of changing because we build our lives around those we love most. And we often question if we can handle the seasons as time grows us old. But there is always Grace for every change.....for every season.
I tell her she is not alone. I some how get myself in those places that feel so empty when my life is so full. And somehow time makes you bolder. Christ can make you stronger in all the years that come and go. Lessons learned, trials go deep and dig hard to the point where you feel your breaking, but the broken are meant for healing and healing reveals JOY........
I can't say I have all the answers. I don't know the right words most of the time. But Beloved I know your not crazy. Your the daughter of the one True King........And I believe those fears and emptiness swirling inside your head are just growing pains.....Just signs of you moving towards another season.
I never understood that ole' saying, "Growing old gracefully" until now......I believe it means you need all the GRACE to grow old because it surely is not easy when your a Mama! And if our loved ones could just understand the many identities and roles we play. So many we try to keep up with. So many we try to be good at...... So many, that we forget who we are. And failure always seems to be looming around the corner. If we could only get one identity right, it would be our identity in Christ. When we get that down everything else will fall in place.......
Let this verse run through your soul and give you peace My sweet Mama friend.....
Sometimes we get so afraid of changing because we build our lives around those we love most. And we often question if we can handle the seasons as time grows us old. But there is always Grace for every change.....for every season.
I tell her she is not alone. I some how get myself in those places that feel so empty when my life is so full. And somehow time makes you bolder. Christ can make you stronger in all the years that come and go. Lessons learned, trials go deep and dig hard to the point where you feel your breaking, but the broken are meant for healing and healing reveals JOY........
I can't say I have all the answers. I don't know the right words most of the time. But Beloved I know your not crazy. Your the daughter of the one True King........And I believe those fears and emptiness swirling inside your head are just growing pains.....Just signs of you moving towards another season.
I never understood that ole' saying, "Growing old gracefully" until now......I believe it means you need all the GRACE to grow old because it surely is not easy when your a Mama! And if our loved ones could just understand the many identities and roles we play. So many we try to keep up with. So many we try to be good at...... So many, that we forget who we are. And failure always seems to be looming around the corner. If we could only get one identity right, it would be our identity in Christ. When we get that down everything else will fall in place.......
Let this verse run through your soul and give you peace My sweet Mama friend.....
- Colossians 3:1-4 I am hidden with Christ in God.
Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.
Thursday, February 19, 2015
"Do Not Be Afraid"
At times I feel so guilty living in a place where persecution is usually nothing more than hateful words. But I am not naive, I know persecution is growing here.
And then all you read in the headlines are the deaths of those that bear the name of Christ and had it etched deep with in their hearts........So deep..... they walked the beach to their earthly death. And I never knew how truly DARK and pain chillingly COLD evil could get and it just seems to be getting ever so much darker.
It makes me wonder how strong is the name of Christ etched upon my heart? Would I bear the name all the way to an untimely death? Because To live is Christ, To die is gain. Would I bear the cross for all to see? When asked if I am a Christ bearer, would I say yes in the face of death?
And I plead to God to just please make this stop. Send your angels. Save our brothers and sisters. Save your children!
But my plan is not His plan.......And all these things must take it's place in time to fulfill that which was redeemed 2000 years ago. Never did He say we would not have broken hearts....We would never feel pain.....Never did He say trials will not come......
What He did Say Is ‘Hear, O Israel, you are approaching the battle against your enemies today. Do not be fainthearted. Do not be afraid, or panic, or tremble before them, Deuteronomy 20:3
Stay with me; do not be afraid, for he who seeks my life seeks your life, for you are safe with me.” 1 Samuel 22:23
Do not be afraid of sudden fear Nor of the onslaught of the wicked when it comes; Proverbs 3:25
Because To live is Christ, To die is gain. Philippians 1:21
When David in Psalms asked: "What can mere man do to me?" He was saying mortal death is nothing compared to eternal life with out God!
And my heart grieves for those that lost their mortal lives, but my heart rejoices because they gave their eternal lives to Christ.
WE are only here for a little while.....
WE are in eternity FOREVER......
Where will you spend your ETERNITY?
I. Am. A. Christ. Bearer!
And then all you read in the headlines are the deaths of those that bear the name of Christ and had it etched deep with in their hearts........So deep..... they walked the beach to their earthly death. And I never knew how truly DARK and pain chillingly COLD evil could get and it just seems to be getting ever so much darker.
It makes me wonder how strong is the name of Christ etched upon my heart? Would I bear the name all the way to an untimely death? Because To live is Christ, To die is gain. Would I bear the cross for all to see? When asked if I am a Christ bearer, would I say yes in the face of death?
And I plead to God to just please make this stop. Send your angels. Save our brothers and sisters. Save your children!
But my plan is not His plan.......And all these things must take it's place in time to fulfill that which was redeemed 2000 years ago. Never did He say we would not have broken hearts....We would never feel pain.....Never did He say trials will not come......
What He did Say Is ‘Hear, O Israel, you are approaching the battle against your enemies today. Do not be fainthearted. Do not be afraid, or panic, or tremble before them, Deuteronomy 20:3
Stay with me; do not be afraid, for he who seeks my life seeks your life, for you are safe with me.” 1 Samuel 22:23
Do not be afraid of sudden fear Nor of the onslaught of the wicked when it comes; Proverbs 3:25
Because To live is Christ, To die is gain. Philippians 1:21
When David in Psalms asked: "What can mere man do to me?" He was saying mortal death is nothing compared to eternal life with out God!
And my heart grieves for those that lost their mortal lives, but my heart rejoices because they gave their eternal lives to Christ.
WE are only here for a little while.....
WE are in eternity FOREVER......
Where will you spend your ETERNITY?
I. Am. A. Christ. Bearer!
Thursday, January 15, 2015
Lessons Learned
If I told you that most times it's better to be silent.....to wait and to observe before you explode into words. Would you listen?
If I told you that patience is definitely worth waiting for, Could you wait for it? Could you wait for God to answer before you jumped on a decision? And yet what you experience in the waiting is the longing for God to do miracles.....And isn't that what God would love for us to do? To long for Him. To want Him, To need Him....
If letting go were easy would we do it more often? Would we grow with out the growing pains?
Took my oldest son to the store to buy household things.....Needful things for first timers being out on their own. So surreal watching the 19 years flash before my eyes. Little boy in my arms melting my heart turned instantly into grown man still melting this Mama's heart. Little by little he's teaching me how to let go. How to hurry up and wait on all these years of milestones.
I believe the best way to learn the hard lessons of life is to learn them together. To live this life with each other, with people....Because can't we learn from each other?.......
Love, patience, Kindness, Communication, Letting Go, Giving, Receiving, Honesty, Loyalty, Forgiveness...
How do we learn all of that by being alone? By excluding others and putting up walls? How do we learn to keep close relationships with out having trials? Because they are gonna come. Like it or not this sin soaked world is gonna break some hearts intentionally and unintentionally. It's up to us on how we handle the brokenness.......
I know why God gave me my man. Because He knew that I needed to learn to wait for patience. I needed to learn to keep quiet and listen and observe. I needed a lesson in humility and service. I needed a man that would keep me grounded when this life of mine takes flight.
I've seen my Sunshine girl go through a trial that made her and her Best friend so much closer than they ever were before! Sometimes trials are necessary to grow.
Did you ever think about the people that come and go in your life. Did you ever look back at the lessons you were learning because of them. And did you know it's okay if they didn't stay....Sometimes they must go so that they can learn from someone else. Oh but the times that they end up staying through the thick and the thin of it? What a huge blessing to have those kind of people in your life! Because life is so much better when we come through hard times together, when we continue to learn together!
Now go live your life today and thank God for those special people that have taught you lessons and from the ones that you are continuing to learn from!
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