It's Time

I feel God leading me....And you will know when He says it's time.

Years ago I met my mentor at church and I was in awe of her. Her grace, her wisdom, and how she handled situations and the people around her.  I wanted to be her......

I asked God to let me lead like that. And He said wait....I bought books and read His word.....and still He said wait......And there are times when you feel He is preparing you for something that is beyond your very own plan.

So I put the books away but, I kept his word near my soul...... let them fill my heart and grow my mind.

This wanting and yearning to be that mentor...to be the one to encourage...to lift up....to let them know they are not alone, well it all happened about 10 years ago. And through the years of growing and stretching....learning and stumbling. He now says it's TIME.

Like any great recipe it has to be well seasoned. And as you add more spices and stir the pot, the flavors start to mingle to make a cherished recipe. The kind that you hand down from generation to generation. What are we handing down to our children? How are we stirring the pot? Are we going by the recipe or are we making it up as we go it alone?

I feel Him pull me in this direction and I'm just patiently letting Him lead. Because I've learned over the years to not rush His plan. Never take it and make it your own.

You see what I have learned, what He has been preparing me for is something I feel so compelled to share. I want to help in any way I can. I want to share with young Mamas, the journey that I have been blessed to live. I've been blessed with messy diaper days, all turned upside down crazy days. I've been blessed with cuddle up days and making cookie days.

I even been blessed with days all done wrong, screaming and yelling days. Loss of patience days and falling on my knees asking for forgiveness days.

I want them to know that the precious gift of being a Mama is God kissed and Heaven sent. It's a Holy calling, the highest of professions.....The only profession that will truly matter to you when the silver glistens in your hair.

Because I never want to look back and see wasted years full of regrets........

I want them to know that I have not yet arrived...I am still on this wild ride of ups and downs but I am learning how to roll with the blows and the twists and turns. We all will get hit with hard situations....It's in how we handle them that effects their lives. You can either strip them of peace, joy and Love or you can be who Christ has called you to be....Filled with PEACE, JOY and LOVE.


So as I wait for Him...Would you be so kind and pray for me and this new adventure I am about to go on. I'm not really sure how it's all going to pan out but, I know it will be wonderful because it's His plan and not mine. His timing and not mine.......I am His.

Be Anxious For Nothing

 She's three weeks old today....All the anticipation and anxiety have long died off and the new is growing strong.

In the last two weeks of my pregnancy I was filled with an anxiousness that would only leave when I talked to my Heavenly Father. He was the only way I could receive peace in this crazy head of mine.

I thought she would arrive early. 12 days to be exact...Because 3 of my babies came 12 days early. With all the early intense contractions.....The nights I would wake out of a sound sleep and breathe deep because they seem so close to the real thing. This peace would come and go...never really taking root in my heart.

My midwife had certain days that she would be out of town. And it was so close to that moment when new life was to arrive....And I would beg the Lord to please let this baby come when my midwife was in town, because I couldn't imagine having this baby with out her.

You see I've known her for about 15 years now. She helped me bring Sunshine girl into this world. She traveled through Tornado's to get to me. She made it with in 5 minutes and Sunshine girl made her appearance.

And as the years have gone by one by one she delivered 3 more. With each child our bond grew. And I can't quite explain it........ this relationship I have with her. She has coached me and encouraged me through the toughest pain I have ever had to bare. She helped me to see the beauty in the rawness of it all. Pulled strength from me that I never new I had. And I Praise God for her.......

And doesn't God place people in our lives at just the right moment...at just the right time. When I was worried, He already had it planned out. He knew what was going to take place and who would be there.........I finally stayed peaceful in the last week of my pregnancy. I came to accept the fact that she might not be the one to deliver this child and I would need to be okay with that...because God was already okay with it.

If you have ever prayed to God for Peace and then finally received it, you will know what I mean when I tell you it's a feeling that overwhelms all your senses. It takes over and lets you rest. His Peace is like the coziest of blankets all snug and close. A  place that you can go and feel safe.  A calm like no other....That's what I felt when I finally let go and let GOD.

Little Zoey Anne arrived 3 days late Just like 2 of my daughters had. But was she really late? In God's eyes I believe she was right on time! He answered my prayers and allowed my midwife to be the one to help bring another into the world yet again.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:6

Trying so Hard Not To Repeat

I've held on to life with a grip so tight it could actually choke out the beauty and mystery of all that it holds. I've turned away and put up walls, blocked out the Son and refused to see the light.

 I've even been known to look inward, always focusing on ME.......

I've hurt hearts, offended friends, and got involved in brokenness that wasn't mine to fix. I've said words that cut through steel and made actions with out ever minding the consequences......

I've chosen unwisely and had to live by my choices....I've had to learn how to mend and know that sometimes I will never be forgiven by others here this side of heaven. But it's in forgiving others that I find peace....

I've seen raging hearts and weak souls and turned and walked away knowing full well I could of made a difference in someones life but, was too busy with my own......

And through all my mess ups and the dirt I dragged my muddy soul into I am being molded and refined. And it's not always easy, the lessons that I learn are not always so simple. And most times I barely come up for air from the hard blow of it all.

But over the years I am still learning GRACE......And Grace has picked me up out of that muddy hole more times than I can count.....And hear my heart, each time was a lesson learned, one that I try very hard not to repeat......Because in this life,  a lesson learned is a sin not repeated.

As I look at this life of mine at the age of 42.......I can honestly say:

My grip on life is not the choking kind.....I have learned to let go when I have to.......when I need to. And most importantly when I do let go, God shows me the beauty in the adventure when I thought there wouldn't be.

I'm attracted to the light and find I always want to walk in it's glow.

I may still hurt hearts but, it's never my intention and when I'm made aware I reach out for forgiveness. I also understand I may never receive it....and that's okay.....I am forgiven by my Heavenly Father and that's truly what matters.

I stay clear of brokenness that was never mine to fix........But I will pray for healing.

I now look for raging hearts and weak souls... I have an overwhelming need to comfort them. To let them know there is a greater LOVE. And when I look outward my eyes see what His heart aches for.

I choose my words and decisions wisely....And still my tongue can manage to sting and my actions may offend. I never claimed to be perfect.....I'm just a sin soaked Mama saved by His Amazing Grace. I may get it right from time to time and then again I may not.......But I live my life differently because I'm always learning, trying so hard not to do the repeating.......

Canning Pumpkin

Some people have asked questions like: "Why do you bother canning when you can go and get it from the store?" My answer, Because that makes me dependent upon someone else. I want to be independent and self sufficient.....And really it tastes so much better than store bought! I know what goes in the jar because I'm the one handling it. It's a skill that should be passed down. I mean if we were all truly honest with our selves, the way things are going over there on Capitol Hill, we all better learn from our ancestors and teach ourselves some trade skills. Skills that will make our lives a little more comfortable. Because truly, it will matter if you are wise in being prepared and being sufficiently independent! And last but not least, I really enjoy doing it! It's my release.....

This is a large recipe for canning pumpkin. I used 8 pie pumpkins for this recipe. The first thing you wanna do is preheat your oven to 350. Then cut your pumpkins in half and scoop out the seeds. Place your pumpkins on a cookie sheet open side down and bake until you can poke a fork through. About an hour.

Scoop your pumpkin out and puree it in your blender. My 8 pumpkins gave me about 24 cups of pureed pumpkin.

Add:
8 C Brown sugar
8 Tsp. Cinnamon
2 Tsp. Nutmeg
3 Tsp. Ginger
2 Tsp. Ground Cloves

Stir until mixed well and put in pint jars. Process at 10 lbs. Pressure for 20 minutes.
Disclaimer: The USDA does not suggest canning pumpkin because of safety issues. 

But I have asked around and found several ladies who have been canning it for years with no trouble. They consider themselves the "Canning Outlaws"......And well, when someone says I can't do something.....I tend to do it any way. *Smile* So yes now I am a "Canning Outlaw".

I processed 18 pints of canned pumpkin almost 2 weeks ago and all have sealed well and still remain sealed. You must use a Pressure canner! Absolutely no hot water bath!

I tried this pumpkin before I jarred it and it is absolutely delicious!!! I will be using it for Breads, Cookies, Pies and everything PUMPKIN!

 I had to share another pic of my shelves just to show you how much they have filled up in the last month or so! This is where I am creative, this is my profession and I take it seriously! I love stuff like this! I love being prepared and providing for my family! This is what I'm passionate about....Being a Stay at home wife and Mama!!

My God Fearing Man

As Christians we are called to be giving and forgiving. But we are also called to gain wisdom through Jesus who gives us life.

 I have stood on the sidelines watching my man be one of the most giving and forgiving people I have ever come across. Time after time he has given so much of himself and his possessions to others when ever they were in need! Lots of times those things never return and lots of times the favor is not given back and yet this man of mine still gives with a very generous heart!

I've always stood behind him whispering in his ear as to what and how I think he should handle his situations......Over the years he has taught me that being hasty and abrupt and telling people what you would really like to tell them is not always the best answer. Patience? Yes this man of mine has patience beyond anything I've ever witnessed. He is a people person. In that I mean his people skills and how he handles his business is a true testament to his character! I can't tell you how many compliments I get about this man of mine and the character he possesses! No he's not perfect...He is sin soaked just like me.....I do have to say God made him to be a perfect fit for me!

But I believe that even the most patient and giving of people have a breaking point....And there comes a time when you just can't let things go. There comes a time when you have to stand up to what is right. Being walked on is not being wise! And it let's the unwise keep repeating the offense not only to you but, to others down the road!

And recently that's just what he has done....He stood up and let the mud slide off his back! Will he forgive? Yes I believe he will. Contrary to his rough outer exterior his heart is soft and pliable. As his wife I have been witness to this many times over! But forgiveness does not mean that the offense goes unrecognized! Will he keep on giving? yes I believe he will. But I believe the wisdom he has gained will make him more cautious next time. You can't help those who don't care about anyone but themselves!


I have to say that I have learned so much in watching him live his life in the 21 years we have been together. In our Marriage God comes first! I firmly believe that our marriage today would not be as strong and intimate if it weren't for the the both of us discovering that God is the man in charge!

He has helped me to become a better child of God, a more loving wife and a better Mama to his children. I was only 20 when we met and I had a ton of growing up to do and I know with out a doubt I would not be where I am today if it wasn't for my God Fearing Man teaching me and guiding me a long the way!

Thank you just doesn't seem to be enough! So very proud to be your wife!